‘I’m Entitled To Feel How I Feel’: Ne-Yo Doubles Down on ‘Insensitive’ Transgender Youth Comments!
TheRoot.com, By Stephanie Holland, Posted September 25th 2023
After seeming to apologize for his original comments, the “So Sick” singer clarified his stance.
Following his controversial comments on how parents of transgender youth support their children, Ne-Yo could’ve just kept quiet and let the story drift to the back of the newscycle. But instead of letting the apology be the last words on the subject, the singer chose to double down on his original statements. On Monday, in an Instagram video he reiterated that he wasn’t trying to offend anyone with his opinions, while also saying he’s actually not sorry. Not apologizing is an interesting way to not offend people.
“This is something I feel very strongly on and I need y’all to hear this from the horse’s mouth, not the publicist’s computer. First and foremost, I did not apologize for having an opinion on this matter,” Ne-Yo said. “I am a 43-year-old heterosexual man raising five boys and two girls. Now, if my opinion offended somebody, yeah sure, I apologize for you being offended because that wasn’t my intention. My intention is never to offend anybody.”
He might have just won the prize for the most condescending apology of the year. “Yeah sure, I apologize for you being offended” has a lot of “can’t be bothered” energy to it. The “Closer” singer went on to once again state his opinion on transgender youth expressing their gender identity.
“I’m entitled to feel how I feel…the same way you are entitled to feel how you feel. I was asked a question and I answered the damn question. I have no beef with the LBGTQIA+ community whatsoever. Do whatever the hell it is you want to do with your kids,” he continued. “I will never be okay with allowing a child to make a decision that’s detrimental to their life. I will never be OK with that. I definitely plan to educate myself a little bit more on this matter. I doubt that there’s any book anywhere, or any opinion that somebody’s gonna tell me, that’s gonna make me OK with letting the child make a decision like that. If I get canceled for this, then maybe this is a world where they don’t need a Ne-Yo no more. And I got no problem with that. I’m a hustler, I’ll figure it out. I got kids to raise and I’m gonna do that regardless.”
In case you feel like he didn’t make himself abundantly clear in the video, he also made many of the same points in the caption.
“If one of my [seven] kids were to decide that he or she wanted to be something other than what they were born as, once they’re old enough and mature enough to make that decision…so be it,” he wrote. “Not gonna love em’ any less. Daddy is still Daddy and he loves you regardless. But this isn’t even a discussion until they are MENTALLY MATURE ENOUGH to have such a discussion. Period. Point blank. Whatever. Y’all do y’all, imma do me and we can agree to disagree and coexist PEACEFULLY. LOVE IS THE ONLY TRUE POWER.”
The only thing I want out of this entire situation is for no one to ever ask Ne-Yo about issues facing the LGBTQ+ community because I think we’ve heard all we need to hear from him.
See the original story below:
Here’s a public service announcement for celebrities: You don’t need to comment on everything you’re asked about. Sometimes you can just say, “I’m not knowledgeable enough to speak on this issue.” This is a lesson R&B singer Ne-Yo learned on Saturday when he decided to give his thoughts on how to parent transgender youth.
During an interview with Gloria Velez of VladTV, he prefaced his comments by saying, “I have no issue with LBG—I have no problem with nobody. You love who you love, you do what you do.” Those are certainly the words of someone who’s well-informed on issues of sexuality and gender identity.
“I just personally come from an era where a man was a man and a woman was a woman,” he said. “And there was two genders, and that’s just how I rocked. You could identify as a goldfish if you feel like, I don’t care. That ain’t my business. It becomes my business when you try to make me play the game with you. I’m not gonna call you a goldfish. But if you wanna be a goldfish, you go be a goldfish. We live in a weird time, man. We do.”
Ne-Yo: When Did it Become OK for a 12-Year-Old Boy to Say He Wants to Be a Girl? (Part 3)
Comparing transgender youth to thinking you’re a goldfish shows a shocking lack of understanding and compassion. The way he and Velez laugh throughout the interview also demonstrates how they don’t appreciate what a difficult time this is for the LGBTQ+ community. Later in the conversation, the father of seven called out parents who allow their children to be open and fluid about their gender.
“I feel like parents have almost forgotten what the role of a parent is. If your little boy comes to you and says, ‘Daddy, I want to be a girl.’ And you just let him rock with that? He’s five…If you let this five-year-old boy decide to eat candy all day, he’s gonna do that,” Ne-Yo said. “When did it become a good idea to let a five-year-old, let a six-year-old, let a 12-year-old make a life-changing decision for themself? When did that happen? I don’t understand. He can’t drive a car yet, but he can decide his sex?”
First of all, no one is performing surgery on five and six-year-olds. I know this is a popular talking point for anti-transgender politicians and organizations, but it’s not true. This statement was part of a larger rant that featured the singer complaining about how “sensitive” the world has become. Frankly, he sounds like a grumpy old man at the barbershop who’s upset that he can’t make inappropriate jokes anymore. After receiving some backlash for his comments, Ne-Yo responded to the criticism on Instagram.
“1st and foremost, I CONDEMN NO ONE. Who am I to condemn anybody? Your life, your kids, your choice. I was asked a question and I answered it,” he wrote. “My opinion is mine. I’m not asking anybody to agree with me nor am I telling you what you can and cannot do with your children. I stated my opinion on a matter and that’s that. Why should I care if my opinion upsets you when you don’t care if yours upsets anyone? Opinions aren’t special. We all have one. People voice them regularly whether they’re asked or not. I was actually asked mine. Agreeing to disagree is not a declaration of war. Y’all do whatever the hell y’all want to. But my feelings on the matter are mine. Same way yours are yours. Meanwhile, I love everybody. Don’t agree with some of y’all’s ideals….but love you no less.”
On Sunday, the Year of the Gentleman artist seemingly realized how his opinions were coming off as transphobic, or maybe he just wanted to put the whole situation behind him, because he issued an apology on X.
“After much reflection, I’d like to express my deepest apologies to anyone that I may have hurt with my comments on parenting and gender identity,” Ne-Yo wrote. “I’ve always been an advocate for love and inclusivity in the LGBTQI+ community, so I understand how my comments could’ve been interpreted as insensitive and offensive. Gender identity is nuanced and I can honestly admit that I plan to better educate myself on the topic, so I can approach future conversations with more empathy. At the end of the day, I lead with love and support everyone’s freedom of expression and pursuit of happiness.”
It’s not up to me to decide how sincere this apology is, but I do hope he truly plans to educate himself before he answers more questions about the topic. This is an extremely dangerous time for the LGBTQ+ community and comments like these from influential people give others license to advance their own hateful agendas.